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Exploring My World - Revisited
Author :KearDarkfire
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While the pillar lowers to the ground, I stop time and enter my void room.

"Rin, do you understand what happened?"

"Yes…"

She was on the ground crying, but she had stopped as I approached her. I walk closer and ask if she wants a hug. She accepted and she cries into my arms. I am the twenty year old Kear. There is no longer a reason to hide as Okia.

We move over to the couch and sit next to each other. She takes a while to calm down, but once she does we start our conversation.

"Rin, your physical body is no more. I can bring you back to life, but only if you decide to. I will give you three choices. You can die and enter the afterlife like normal. I can bring you back to life, but I will no longer be involved in you and your world. The last choice is to stay here with me and I will let you watch over your family. You can take all the time to think about it."

Rin looks away from me. I know that all those choices are me being selfish, but I realized that my involvement, like I had done lead to those events. Well not all of it, but enough that I will step back. If I go to a world I either need to erase my memories or never get involved like I did with my family. I should be an observer with my memories or a regular person without.

I also add more.

"No matter what I will let you talk to your family."

"Thank you. Even since we met I always considered you like a sibling."

"I have too. It means so much to me to have a family. I had been alone for a long time."

Whether or not that influenced her decision, Rin made her decision.

"Then can I stay here?"

"You will only be able to watch your family. Unless they come here you will not be able to talk to them."

Rin just nods as she accepts that. Honestly I really hoped she would choose that option.

"Before that becomes your final decision, talk with your family."

---

I teleport the adults and the children to us in my void room. They are a little shocked initially, but as Zinleth sees Rin he runs to her. The kids go to their parents and after a few moments I ask everyone to sit at the dining table.

I really wonder how telling the kids that Rin is dead when she is alive next to them will go. This is going to be tough. Honestly I feel bad about that too. Glandriel will have it tough, but I hope that they can accept it.

"Now I will clarify things for everyone. Guhnden has been defeated." The kids were the only ones that cheered, but stopped quickly seeing the adults didn't share their excitement. I continued, "Now I know this will be hard to accept, but…"

Actually I couldn't continue. I didn't know what to say. How do I explain that Rin is no longer alive. Rin picked up where I left off. That must be difficult for her. She hugs Zinleth and Glandriel.

"I love you so much. With everything I have I will watch you."

"Mom what are you talking about?"


Rin and Zinleth don't answer they just hug and cry it out. A few moments later Glandriel starts to guess what happened. He is smart enough to know something is wrong. Korral is whispering to her dads asking what is wrong. They just keep her close. They don't speak about it, as I'm sure like me it is tough to talk about.

I make a door to some random room behind the dining table. I bring Pax, Kaalm and Korral with me to give them some time alone to talk through it.

I make a couch, a chair, a small table and a lamp to light up the area. I do enjoy the dark room.

As they sit down I tell Korral what happened.

"In the battle against Guhnden, Rin was killed."

"What do you mean? She is alive…?"

I guess she is understanding now.

"I guess the best way to explain it is like her physical body is gone."

"Can't you bring her back?"

"I talked with her before you guys got here. I gave her some choices to consider. She is going to tell me her final decision once she is ready."

"But aren't you a God? Can't you do anything?"

"That in itself is a problem…" I lean back into the chair I am sitting in before I continue. "If I kept her alive, I wouldn't involve myself in the world anymore. While minimally, I had some hand in the events that happened. If I get involved in one way or another, it doesn't change that I got involved does it. Most of the reason why, is because I am a 'God'."

When I say god, I make air quotes with my pointer and middle finger on both my hands. They might not get it, but that isn't what this is about.

"I want to learn and enjoy life: freedom. By getting involved with you all, I gave you all priority. I have saved you all from death. I am fine with that, because I love you guys. You all let me be apart of this family and called me friend. I'm grateful."

"If I used my power without control, then wouldn't I decide who lives and dies like I already have. I don't like that. I would think to myself 'that is a god's job, right?', but you are not wrong. I never told you who I was before becoming a 'God'."

---

I told them I used to be a human in another world. Who I was and what I did. Eventually telling them I died and then I came here and became a 'God'. I know I am omnipotent, but it is something that would take a long time to get used to.

Am I really a God? Could this just be a dream? I don't know, so I will treat it as real till I find out. That is a whole rabbit hole that I would never find my way out. I used my power to find out, but it just said that I was. That doesn't help me at all. I have questions, but no answers to them. Honestly, I don't think I will ever get the answers. Well I'm fine with it.

"So Kear isn't even your name?"

Korral asked me. I am happy she did, because I started to feel this sense of dread from my thoughts.

"No. Even though the name I used to have was fine, Kear was something I just made up. For better or for worse, I like it and will stick to it."

"I thought your previous name sounded nice…"

Korral told me that. In a way I felt happy to hear it, but it doesn't matter. Pax and Kaalm had just listened to the story. I did give a laugh before when Pax heard there were more worlds out there. I did have a small chuckle from that.

---

I let them ask me any question they wanted. Pax had asked more about my world, Kaalm wanted to know about on the countries that had been destroyed in the past, and Korral asked things about their current world. I told them what they wanted and that lead to more questions, but we had a long chat.

A while later Rin finished with her decision and reassuring her family. That had to have been a difficult conversation. I saw that Glandriel and Zinleth hugging her, with tears in their eyes. I could feel the emotional exhaustion they were going through.

As I saw them back off from each other I spoke up. Zinleth had his hand tightened around Glandriel shoulder. I think he was having a tough time even standing at this point.

Rin had eyes full of resolve, but I wanted to make sure.

"Are you sure?"

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